Commentary Analysis

John Murray, Ian Dennis & Ali Bruce-Ball answer listener questions. From why they still use lip mics to how they deal with criticism… do they still go to game as fans? And which data do they find most useful/useless? Messages, questions and voicenotes welcome on WhatsApp to 08000 289 369 & emails to [email protected] 01:05 Lip mics and why commentators still use them, 07:20 How they find out which matches they’re doing, 10:00 Working with different summarisers, 19:10 Seeing too much flesh in commentary, 22:00 Avoiding venting personal views in commentary, 26:20 5 Live commentaries this weekend, 27:50 Do the commentators ever watch as fans? 34:40 Which data are the most useful/useless? 44:00 Does criticism affect their commentaries? 47:20 Which TV programmes would they do? 5 Live / BBC Sounds commentaries: Fri 1945 England v Uruguay with John Murray, Ian Dennis & Paul Robinson, Sat 1330 Man Utd v Man City in WSL with Mike Minay & Lindsay Johnson, Sun 1200 Chelsea v Aston Villa in WSL with Vicki Sparks & Anita Asante. Great Glossary of Football Commentary: DIVISION ONE Agricultural challenge, Back of the net, Back to square one, Booked, Bosman, Bullet header, Channel of joy, Coupon buster, Cruyff Turn, Cultured/educated left foot, Dead-ball specialist, Draught excluder, Elastico/flip-flap, False nine, Fox in the box, Giving the goalkeeper the eyes, Grub hunter, Head tennis, Hibs it, In a good moment, In behind, Magic of the FA Cup, The Maradona, Off their line, Olimpico, Onion bag, Panenka, Park the bus, Perfect hat-trick, Piledriver, Put his cap on it, Rabona, Roy of the Rovers stuff, Schmeichel-style, Scorpion kick, Spursy, Stick it in the mixer, Sweeper keeper, Target man, Tiki-taka, Towering header, Trivela, Where the kookaburra sleeps, Where the owl sleeps, Where the spiders sleep. DIVISION TWO 2-0 can be a dangerous score, Asterisk, Back on the grass, Ball stays hit, Beaten all ends up, Blaze over the bar, Business end, Came down with snow on it, Catching practice, Camped in the opposition half, Cauldron atmosphere Coat is on a shoogly peg, Come back to haunt them, Corridor of uncertainty, Couldn’t sort their feet out, Easy tap-in, Daisy-cutter, Drubbing, First cab off the rank, Giant-killing, Goalkeepers’ Union, Good leave, Good touch for a big man, Half-turn, Has that in his locker, High wide and not very handsome, Hospital pass, Howler, In the dugout, In the hat, In their pocket, Johnny on the spot, Lackadaisical, Leading the line, Leather a shot, Middle of the park, Needed no second invitation, Nice headache to have, No-look pass, Nutmeg, On their bike, One for the cameras, One for the purists, Played us off the park, Points to the spot, Prawn sandwich brigade, Purple patch, Put their laces through it, Queensbury rules, Reaches for their pocket, Rolls Royce, Root and branch review, Row Z, Screamer, Seats on the plane, Show across the bows, Slide-rule pass, Staving off relegation, Steal a march, Sting the palms, Straight in the bread basket, Stramash, Taking one for the team, Telegraphed that pass, Tired legs, That’s great… (football), Thunderous strike, Turns on a sixpence, Walk it in, We’ve got a cup tie on our hands. UNSORTED After you Claude, All-Premier League affair, Aplomb, Bag/box of tricks, Brace, Brandished, Bread and butter, Breaking the deadlock, Bundled over the line, Champions elect / champions apparent, Clinical finish, Commentator’s curse, Denied by the woodwork, Draught excluder, Elimination line, Fellow countryman, Foot race, Formerly of this parish, Free hit, Goalmouth scramble, Honeymoon Period, In and around, In the shop window, Keeping ball under their spell, Keystone Cops defending, Languishing, Loitering with intent, Marching orders, Nestle in the bottom corner, Numbered derbies, Opposite number, PK for penalty-kick, Postage stamp, Rasping shot, Red wine not white wine, Relegation six-pointer, Rooted at the bottom, Route One, Sending the goalkeeper the wrong way, Shooting boots, Sleeping giants, Slide rule pass, Small matter of, Spiders web, Stayed hit, Steepling, Stonewall penalty, Straight off the training ground, Taking one for the team, Team that likes to play football, Thruppenny bit head / 50p head, Two good feet, Turning into a basketball match, Turning into a cricket score, Usher/Shepherd the ball out of play, Walking a disciplinary tightrope, Wand of a left foot, Wrap foot around it, Your De Bruynes, your Gundogans etc.

John Murray, Ian Dennis & Ali Bruce-Ball discuss what it’s like being a commentator at Christmas. They look ahead to the festive schedule, Ian aims to stretch his lead in Clash of the Commentators, there are more unintended pub and film names, and which commentary phrases will end up in our Great Glossary? Suggestions welcome on WhatsApp voicenotes to 08000 289 369 & emails to [email protected] 00:40 What is Christmas like for commentators? 03:25 Is it right to play at 8pm on Boxing Day? 05:10 John gets wet at Newcastle 07:40 Christmas commentary bingo 12:30 John’s special treatment in Madrid 17:15 Commentary highlights this festive period 19:10 Unintended pub names & film titles 30:20 Clash of the Commentators 37:15 Great Glossary of Football Commentary 5 Live / BBC Sounds Premier League commentaries: Sat 20 Dec 1500 Man City v West Ham, Sat 20 Dec 1500 Brighton v Sunderland on Sports Extra, Sat 20 Dec 1730 Tottenham v Liverpool, Sun 21 Dec 1330 Hearts v Rangers, Sun 21 Dec 1630 Aston Villa v Man Utd, Tue 23 Dec 2000 Arsenal v Palace in EFL Cup QF. Great Glossary of Football Commentary: DIVISION ONE Blaze over the bar, Bosman, Cruyff Turn, Dead-ball specialist, Fox in the box, Giving the goalkeeper the eyes, Head tennis, Hibs it, In a good moment, The Maradona, Off their line, Olimpico, Onion bag, Panenka, Perfect hat-trick, Rabona, Schmeichel-style, Scorpion kick, Spursy, Tiki-taka, Where the kookaburra sleeps, Where the owl sleeps, Where the spiders sleep. DIVISION TWO Ball stays hit, Beaten all ends up, Business end, Came down with snow on it, Catching practice, Camped in the opposition half, Cauldron atmosphere Coat is on a shoogly peg, Come back to haunt them, Corridor of uncertainty, Couldn’t sort their feet out, Easy tap-in, Daisy-cutter, First cab off the rank, Good leave, Half-turn, Has that in his locker, High wide and not very handsome, Hospital pass, Howler, In their pocket, Johnny on the spot, Leading the line, Nice headache to have, Nutmeg, One for the cameras, One for the purists, Played us off the park, Points to the spot, Purple patch, Put their laces through it, Reaches for their pocket, Rolls Royce, Root and branch review, Row Z, Screamer, Seats on the plane, Show across the bows, Slide-rule pass, Steal a march, Stramash, Taking one for the team, Telegraphed that pass, That’s great… (football), Thunderous strike, Walk it in.

John Murray, Ian Dennis & Ali Bruce-Ball talk football, travel & language. They hear from Thomas Tuchel after leaving Bellingham, Foden & Grealish out of his England squad. Plus, John is ‘humbled’ by a commentary tattoo, and will anything join the ‘Cruyff Turn’ in Division One of the Great Glossary of Football Commentary? Get your suggestions in with WhatsApp voicenotes to 08000 289 369 & emails to [email protected] 02:45 Ali has his car back! 06:05 Thomas Tuchel announces England squad, 13:50 Detailed beard analysis, 18:10 5 Live commentaries this weekend, 19:00 Forest fans turn on Ange Postecoglou, 21:05 Selhurst Park adorned with 5 Live quotes, 22:30 John ‘humbled’ by commentary tattoo, 23:35 Can Crystal Palace win the Premier League? 26:20 Ali vs Ian in Clash of the Commentators, 33:00 The Great Glossary of Football Commentary. BBC Sounds / 5 Live Premier League commentaries: Sat 1500 Arsenal v West Ham, Sat 1500 Man Utd v Sunderland on Sports Extra, Sat 1730 Chelsea v Liverpool, Sun 1400 Newcastle v Forest, Sun 1400 Everton v Palace on Sports Extra Sun 1400 Aston Villa v Burnley on BBC Sport website & app, Sun 1400 Wolves v Brighton on BBC Sport website & app, Sun 1630 Brentford v Man City. Glossary so far: DIVISION ONE Bosman, Cruyff Turn, Onion bag, Panenka, Rabona, Where the kookaburra sleeps, Where the owl sleeps, Where the spiders sleep. DIVISION TWO Daisycutter, Howler, One for the cameras, Played us off the park, Purple patch, Root and branch review, Row Z, Taking one for the team, That’s great… (football), Thunderous strike. UNSORTED 2-0 is a dangerous score, After you Claude, All-Premier League affair, Aplomb, Bag/box of tricks, Brace, Brandished, Breaking the deadlock, Bundled over the line, Champions elect / champions apparent, Clinical finish, Commentator’s curse, Coupon buster, Cultured/Educated left foot, Denied by the woodwork, Draught excluder, Elimination line, Fellow countryman, Foot race, Formerly of this parish, Fox in the box, Free hit, Goalkeepers’ Union, Goalmouth scramble, Good touch for a big man, Honeymoon Period, In and around, In the shop window, Keeping ball under their spell, Keystone Cops defending, Languishing, Loitering with intent, Marching orders, Nestle in the bottom corner, Numbered derbies, Nutmeg, Opposite number, Park the bus, PK for penalty-kick, Postage stamp, Put it in the mixer, Put their laces through it, Rasping shot, Red wine not white wine, Relegation six-pointer, Rooted at the bottom, Route One, Roy of the Rovers stuff, Sending the goalkeeper the wrong way, Shooting boots, Sleeping giants, Slide rule pass, Small matter of, Spiders web, Stayed hit, Steepling, Stinging the palms, Stonewall penalty, Straight off the training ground, Stramash, Taking one for the team, Team that likes to play football, Throw their cap on it, Thruppenny bit head / 50p head, Towering header, Two good feet, Turning into a basketball match, Turning into a cricket score, Usher/Shepherd the ball out of play, Walking a disciplinary tightrope, Wand of a left foot, We’ve got a cup tie on our hands, Winger in their pocket, Wrap foot around it, Your De Bruynes, your Gundogans etc.

Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: football pundits available on a free transfer, Big Dan Burn's week becomes a fortnight, a commentator superbly self-policing his woodwork judgment, some unexpected co-commentary during North Macedonia vs Wales, the Maldini/Baresi myth claims a high-profile victim, ex-Spurs defenders in Jonas Brothers singles and Chelsea suffer a textbook club-crisis moment. Meanwhile, the panel wonder if Erling Haaland has passed the "human after all" stage and discuss the unevolving art of pun-based FPL team names. Adam's book, Extra Time Beckons, Penalties Loom: How to Use (and Abuse) The Language of Football, is OUT NOW: https://geni.us/ExtraTimeBeckons Visit nordvpn.com/cliches to get four extra months on a two-year plan with NordVPN Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: the post-Ten Hag news cycle begins in earnest, a brief but tantalising moment of doubt over whether Peter Drury said the word "dude" on commentary, the ongoing devaluing of the phrase "captain's goal", too many footballers' names in the new Jack Reacher novel, Barcelona's plucky tweeting, and a strange mix-up involving two Andy Townsends. Meanwhile, the panel discuss which Premier League manager looks the most "darts" and enjoy the performance of a football commentator on a mid-1990s tv quiz show. Adam's new book, Extra Time Beckons, Penalties Loom: How to Use (and Abuse) The Language of Football, is OUT NOW: https://geni.us/ExtraTimeBeckons Visit nordvpn.com/cliches to get four extra months on a two-year plan with NordVPN Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker for the Adjudication Panel. The agenda includes: whether Arsenal won the north London derby "the hard way", when Sarcastic Pep becomes impossible to separate from Normal Pep, commentators answering their own rhetorical questions, teams "sealing" relegation, more footballspeak at the snooker, a footballer-sounding shampoo innovation and Harry Redknapp opening a local supermarket. Meanwhile, the panel analyse a listener's Missing Piece of the Jigsaw XI and enjoy some more vintage Andy Gray co-commentary. Get your Football Cliches merch here: https://www.100-percent.co.uk/collections/football-cliches Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices